What Perfumery Taught Me About Motherhood (And Why I Stopped Freestyling)

I’ve always loved art,  the kind you can feel, taste, wear… and smell.

Cooking has always been my safe space. I cook like I live, with heart, with rhythm, with instinct. I don’t follow recipes to the letter. I throw in extra spice, I swap ingredients, I freestyle and it almost always works out beautifully.

But perfumery? That’s a different kind of art.
(So is motherhood.)

Both caught me off guard, in the most humbling, and transforming way.

When ‘Extra’ Is Too Much

When I started blending perfumes for Sahilia, I assumed the same rules would apply. A little extra rose? Why not. A bit more oud? Surely it’ll deepen the scent.

But I quickly learned: perfumery isn’t about throwing in what you love.
It’s about restraint, listening and precision.

No matter how much I love a scent, I can’t just put in a lot of it!
Too much of even the most beautiful note can overpower the entire composition. The balance  lost, and the whole story gets confused.

The same, I realised, happens in motherhood. You give everything, your time, your energy, your love, but sometimes, more isn’t always better.
There are moments when my instinct is to fix, to help, to add more structure, more routine, more “right” choices… but I’ve learned that smothering can overwhelm.

Just like with perfume, balance is key.
Children, like scent notes, need space to breathe.
They need gentle guidance, not too much force.
They need presence, not perfection.

I used to think being a “good mother” meant doing more.
Now I know it’s about being attuned.
Just like crafting a fragrance , it’s not about how much you add,
It’s about what you choose to leave out.

Scent Notes & Life Lessons

Some perfume ingredients are gentle, they take time to bloom, slowly revealing themselves as they warm on the skin. Others are bold and heady, announcing their presence the moment you open the bottle.

That’s exactly how my children are.
Some days, they’re quiet and need coaxing. Other days, loud, fiery, all heart. And I’m learning to meet each moment with curiosity  and not control.

Perfume is teaching me to slow down and listen.
To know when to pause.
To give things ,and people space to unfold.

The Art of Precision & Patience

There’s something deeply humbling about working with scent. You can't rush it. You can't always correct it once it’s gone too far.

Motherhood is the same. You show up, you tune in, you adjust.
You accept that you’re not the main character, you are only the one guiding the blend.

I used to think art was about bold expression. Now I understand: sometimes, it’s about holding back. About trusting the process. About honouring the quiet beauty of balance.

Sahilia: A Journey of Scent, Self & Soul

Sahilia isn’t just a perfume brand. It’s a reflection of everything I’m learning ,about womanhood, ritual, creativity, and care.

Every drop is considered. Every blend tells a story inspired by the Sahel

I don’t get it right all the time. But that’s okay.
Because just like motherhood, perfumery is a practice.

Your Turn

Have you ever been surprised by how one part of your life taught you something about another? Whether you're a parent, a maker, or just someone learning to live with intention i’d love to hear your story.

Share with me in the comments or connect over on Instagram @sahiliatribe

Explore Sahilia’s Signature Oils

Try the Discovery Set  and experience the unfolding of each scent for yourself, one drop at a time.